Coronation Street – Wednesday 4 December

As Carla and Peter’s big day arrives, there are more questions than answers; will Peter go through with the wedding? Will he be able to resist Tina? Will the last minute DJ be any cop? One thing is for sure though, when it comes to weddings, tears and laughter are guaranteed, and this episode has both in abundance.

Hayley is all set for the wedding and appears in the café, beaming; a vision in blue. Roy is speechless with all he feels and needs to say in his mesmerised expression. As they pose for a photo, feelings of finality are evoked rather than the beginnings weddings normally inspire thoughts of. He has thoughtfully hired a car, and they are chauffeured to the wedding in style. While it’s a happy occasion, the couple must contemplate their own relationship and the love they have for one another, and relive their own wedding day. After they arrive at the hotel, Carla expresses her fears in a heart to heart with Hayley, who reassures her that everything will be fine.

With Maria on hairdressing duties, Audrey is flying solo at the salon and David makes a timely appearance as a frankly rude Mary insists on her appointment being kept. After he is given an ultimatum regarding maintenance by Gail, Audrey offers him a job on condition that he stay away from Kylie and the children.

Sally continues to act the doormat as she buys a suit from Dapperman for a disinterested Tim, a purchase which, together with her airs and graces, is a continuous source of amusement. Already disgusted that he is considering window cleaning for a living, it’s hilarious to see her out on the cobbles in her best frock faced with his latest purchase; an old banger of a van with “Flush and Go” hanging in there on the side; “Problems with your piping?” it asks, “We’re here to keep you moving”. A comfort to Sally I’m sure. She is mortified arriving at the wedding in it, but all of a sudden window cleaning isn’t so bad as she assures Roy and Hayley that he’s not in the drains business.

Over at Carla and Peter’s flat, best man Steve’s philosophising continues as he aptly observes “temptation knows men are weak and its timing is rubbish”. Once alone, Peter receives a visit from Tina who tells him not to do anything he’ll regret.

As the wedding guests arrive at the hotel and mingle, Tracy is her vile self, slagging Tina over Tommy, and calling the venue old fashioned despite being the one sporting a side ponytail.

Peter has Steve and the rest of the guests worried as he puts in a late appearance. Relief all round, except perhaps for Tina and Rob, the wedding gets underway. As we hear the beautiful vows, our hearts break at Roy and Hayley’s tender touch and the emotion on their faces. Michelle’s speech is just as heart rending as she speaks of “the moment of their last parting”. Carla’s tears are moving as we know how much she loves Peter and what she stands to lose.

Once married, the reception isn’t the only thing in full flow as Carla downs the wine and champagne with gusto. Their first dance lasts all of two seconds before she awkwardly sets Peter up with Tina.

And they aren’t the only pair battling sexual tension. While Tim continued to embarrass Sally by having a snooze in the church and leaving his tag hanging out, her gamey side comes out at the reception as they topple up to the bridal suite for an interlude in the proceedings. Overcome with passion they may be, but she’s still careful to fold the suit complete with tag to ensure a refund. As a disgusted Michelle bursts into the room with Steve, Tim accuses them of being up to the same trick. Put out that the bridal suite is engaged, Steve and Michelle appear to resort to love in an elevator. “Talk about the cat who caught the cream” she purrs; yes Michelle is catty, but we can only presume that she bathed in milk the night before as she appears to have woken up as Cleopatra.

It’s lucky Tim only asked Michelle and Steve to spare them five minutes, as it’s only a matter of time before a drunken Carla has to be put to bed by a disappointed Peter and a concerned Hayley.

Meanwhile Fiz thanks Roy for all they have done for her, and he tells her Hayley loves her as her own. She decides to tell him about Christian. Roy is understanding and compassionate, accepting that she was under duress when she told him about Hayley’s illness. When they arrive home to find Christian waiting for them, they tell him now is not the time. Inside, Jenna has kindly left them the beautiful photo from the morning and it’s a poignant reminder that a time will come when this photo will be the only tangible thing Roy has to remember this day by. If wedding photos capture couples embarking on a future journey, Roy and Hayley’s picture sadly represents the near conclusion of a wonderful life lived together.

Sally and Tim take the party home and she asks him to move in much to Sophie’s disgust. You won’t change me, he tells her, and she tells him she can try which is surely the worst footing on which to begin living together.

Back at the hotel, Peter has said farewell to all the guests except for Tina who remains behind. They give in to temptation with a passionate kiss, but Peter’s hesitation mid-snog sees Tina walk out. As he stands alone at his own reception, the man who wants to have his wedding cake and eat it has a lot to think about.

By Emma Hynes
www.emmahynes.wordpress.com
Twitter: @ELHynes